Tovah F Every Day is A New Day
The last year and a half since the pandemic began, we as adults, have focused a lot on what we have lost – the loss of learning time, the loss of interaction with our friends, the loss of lives because of this pandemic. And it is so important to recognize, especially for our children and the youth that we support, how much they have gained over this past year and a half. The way that our youth have handled the pandemic is astounding to me, the way that on September 8, we’re able to get up and put a backpack on and go back into the building was really powerful to see.
So rather than focusing on what our children have lost, focus on some of the things that they have gained. How much family time did we get to spend together this year? How many conversations did we have with our children?
Just recognize that anything that our child is feeling today doesn’t mean it’s going to last forever. When our children come home and they have anxiety or they’re worried about friends that they’re going to meet, talk them through it. Have those conversations and validate how they are feeling and remind them that every day is a new day. If they have an off day on a Wednesday, guess what, Thursday is a new day. And if they have an off morning, afternoon is a new moment as well.
We do not have to be permanent with our behavior or permanent with our thoughts and feelings and just remind our children that and remind yourself that too patient has been a challenge over this pandemic.
I urge all of you to just remember to give yourselves abundant grace and give your children abundant grace as well. If your child comes to you with a lot of stress, a lot of emotions, a lot of fear about school or about anything going on outside of the home, the first thing that you want to do for yourself as the adult is take a deep breath, remind yourself that this is your kiddo and that you know what is best for your child. So that’s the first thing that you want to do.
The second thing you want to do is you really want to give yourself patience and that sounds kind of cliché I recognize.
But with everything that we have been through over the last couple of years with the Pandemic, we have to realize that we are all doing the very best that we can do with the resources that we have.
The next thing is to support your child and ask them, especially if you have an older student, especially if you have a child middle through high school. How do they want you to support them? What do they need from you? Because oftentimes as adults, we jump right into an action because the Mama-bear comes out or the parent-bear comes out and we want to support our kids.
So we immediately go into jumping to action. But sometimes what our child needs is for us to sit and hear them and hold their hands and validate how they are feeling. Everything that we are doing is going to be right in the moment if we are doing it through the lens of what our child needs, if we are doing it through the lens of “what is my child asking for me and how can I support my child?” The more that we sit with them and that we hear them out, the closer your relationship will be with that child and the more that you’ll be able to recognize what you need to do to support at that school level as well.